I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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