I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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