Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Randomize
