Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
