how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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