East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
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