Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
They are going to name an STD after you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
my penis made a compromise with my morals
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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