honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Sext me about skeletons
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
