these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
