Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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