I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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