I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
