Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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