Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
