Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize