Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Randomize
