What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
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