I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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