john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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