even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
