Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
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