But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Randomize
