I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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