So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
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