you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
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want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
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And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
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