sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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