absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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