New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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