I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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