Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
You can't special order awesome
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
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