I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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