i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
