Me. At least after what I've been through.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
