a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize