I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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