VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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