i just wanna soil my oats bro
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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