she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
