He is like the real live version of the state fair..
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
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