I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize