We're like a lot better than the average bears
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
