I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
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