this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize