Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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