Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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