Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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