Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
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