Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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