i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize