That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
