Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
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I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
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I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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